The princess and the workplace pea

If ever you’re looking for a metaphor to describe a workplace thought, Hans Christian Andersen is a decent place to start. Emperor’s New Clothes, Ugly Duckling etc. all provide a rich seam of cautionary tales that we can use to brighten up the otherwise mundane.

To that, I would like to add The Princess and the Pea. The tale of a Princess who has to prove herself worthy to be matched to the handsome Prince, whose family suspects she is lying about her heritage. To test her credentials they place a single uncooked pea under her mattress and in the morning when she complains of a rough night sleep, caused by such a small item, they realise she is a Princess because only a Princess can be so delicate……..ok, it hasn’t aged well but remember we’re looking at a metaphor here…..

The principle here is that something so small can become a huge irritant.

(Buckle up for a topic switch)…..which is what I thought of when I spoke to a workplace leader as they emerged from their very swanky, clearly expensively put-together office in London. I made a ‘oooo that’s nice’ noise, and to which they instantly countered with ‘yeah, but you know what really grinds my gears……

…every door has a handle on each side, and I never know whether to push or pull. And I get it wrong, every single time’.

This simple quip from an experienced workplace professional immediately brought two thoughts to mind.

The first was the cautionary advice of someone well-known in the sector, Simon Heath. Many will know him for his AMAZING illustrations, but a few of us realise that there is some razor-sharp insight hidden behind that extremely talented pen. I initially met him through the Workplace Conversation Project, where he frequently brought us back to focus when we started going off track. He would ask how our discussion related to the "panel beater in Solihull," emphasising that we often view workplace issues from the perspective of knowledge workers in London rather than considering the experiences of the average member of the workforce. Something that I know Mark Eltringham of Workplace Insight is also keen to remind people about.

The other thought was a standout moment at WORKTECH London ’24. I saw that there was a resident poet on the line-up, and I’ll be honest, my heart sank a little bit. I’ve seen plenty of novelty ideas used to liven up an audience, and most leave me a little flat, but then Matt Harvey stood up and read his amazing poem, Work Perks. An ode to the simple things that most consider to be the world of work. Now, it’s really about stealing things from the office, but it comes from a place where I would argue the vast majority of the workforce is coming from. They’re not talking about collaboration spaces, activity-based working, biophilia or any of your other fancy workplace topics that we’re used to hearing about at the latest industry event.

They’re wondering what the soup of the day is. Or which bin to put the recycling in.

I worry that we’re in search of some big solution to a big problem, but instead, we’d be better served just understanding what those micro-frustrations were. What old colleague of mine, somewhat convolutedly, called ‘productivity toxins’. That is a somewhat ironic description of the problem I’m getting at here. They’re not productivity toxins. They’re just f*****g annoying.

Hybrid work, I think, provides us with a useful example of those frustrations and all of these are taken from some of the real-world feedback we’ve analysed on behalf of our clients.

Come into the office…..that’s if I can get a desk.

So often, we see people complaining about desk booking systems. Either they’re difficult to use or, and more commonly, there are bad behaviours around them. Block booking, no-shows, ignoring whether it’s booked by someone else or simply hogging non-assigned desks. If we want people to come back into the office, we have to at least make sure they have a destination.

Got a desk, but where do I put my stuff?

I’m not one for pedestals, but some work needs to be done on locker solutions. We so often see people having to go to the other side of the building or another floor (!) from where they eventually find a desk for the day. I don’t know if that’s because the desk booking system is working independently of the locker booking system, but it would be nice if they came as a package. And with clean desk policies now, and the frequent feedback about each desk seemingly having a different cable system, people are having to bring a bundle of gear to make sure they can use the fancy screen on the desk. So, where does all that go?

But where is everybody?

You’ve done the school run, battled the commute, managed to actually get a desk…..but it’s nowhere near your team, who have all booked desks on different floors. Or they have decided to work from home, so you’ve ended up doing your meetings with four people on Teams, and you're disturbing everyone in the open-plan office.

Where are all the meeting rooms?

That’s ok, there will be stacks of places to meet because that’s why we’re here, right? To collaborate……wrong! In a rush of blood post-pandemic, we removed all the meeting rooms to create informal meeting spaces. You know, a couple of sofas and a mobile whiteboard, right next to the noisy sales team, or even worse, right behind the folks in finance, trying to do some counting! So, meeting rooms are at a premium, and those in the know block book them in advance to ensure that their Executive Directors aren’t found wanting. Meaning that more people start block booking, and eventually, you have no chance of getting space for a team briefing or sales call. And then you spot Dave, who has bagged a room for the day because he didn’t get a desk. ARGH!

All of this is running through the head of one of your employees as they brush their teeth and start pondering the day ahead. Wait till they realise there are no spaces in the car park.

It seems that many organisations focus on grand strategies and innovations to shape the workplace experience, but often overlook the micro-frustrations that impact employees day to day. Tackling these small, persistent issues is just as vital to building a positive and productive work environment.

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